Ok, first I will start with a short side note that says after reading my last entry I sound like a competely shallow girl. I'm not. I got over the height issue long enough to give divorced guy a chance. And he is wonderful. And I am taking it slow with him. It's been quite a small roller coaster already, considering I am still stuck on not letting my guard down. With him it's not that infatuation, the need to be talking to them every second of the day, the day dreams. He is reality. He is realistic. He is comforting, almost the feeling of coming home. He makes me laugh, he makes me smile, he gives me the cute little butterflies when he makes fun of me which happens quite often, and we just work. There is that comfortable silence laying there next to him that just seems to work. And he might be around for a while, mr. jake..... (#3....ha ha)
Ok so that side note was not so short.....ha ha. So for the realizations that Marley & Me made me have. For all of those who have seen this movie, I was guaranteed a good cry. At least that is what everyone said. So I rented Hauting of Conneticut (which I watched all alone at work IN THE DARK. Jake said I was retarted....ha ha.) and Marley & Me which would have been the comical reflief to follow. I started watching this movie and my first thoughts were "it's my brother's psycho dog on tv!" Love you Chris and Linds, but Roxy is INSANE. Yes I said it. INSANE. As the movie progress and they had their second child and jennifer aniston is having a freak out moment, well moments, I got nervous. I got nervous to have kids. To have a psycho dog. To have the kind of life I'm suppose to be working toward. As the show progressed I had the thought that my future kids can live without a dog. I can think about becoming a cat person. Ha ha RIGHT! And at the end of the movie (AND IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT, STOP READING....oh wait. SUCH a predictable movie) I had still not cried like everyone had promised. The dog died. Everyone is being centimental. And then they go to burry the dog. And the little boy got me. And i cried. Good thing cause I was getting nervous that I had turned into a heartless person. All of the years of pain had turned me heartless. But good news. I STILL HAVE FEELINGS! Good thing too cause it made me realize that I care. And even after all of these terrible things in the movie happend, it makes you want that life. It makes me want three kids, with the loving and hard working husband, with the FABULOUS house in the country just outside the city. And of course that is just terrifying. And naturally that is what I'm suppose to want. So now it's just an exciting, scary thing that will happen to me one day. And who knows when it will happen. But I've got to say that I don't think I'm dreading it anymore....
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